Are Swedish Women In Danger of Extinction?
Marriage Failures in Sweden Are Up
In 2013, a total of 25,100 Swedish marriages ended in divorce. That’s a record high since 1975 according to figures released by Statistics Sweden (Statistika centralbyrån). Now, more and more people prefer to engage in long-term partnerships, thus having children outside of marriages. However, even though the statistics regarding the termination of these relationships are harder to track, my Swedish clients are telling me these partnerships do not last long either. Break-ups for couples with children continue to have a huge toll on everyone involved, from the parents to the child. This is leaving a trajicly large pool of divorced moms in Sweden.
The Plight of Divorced Swedish Women
Since they are whom I work with, I will speak the divorced women’s side of this equation. After meeting and working with many women, what I have found is that the single moms in Sweden are exhausted, overwhelmed, and frustrated. 90 percent of the women that I have talked to, reported that they have or were experiencing burn-out, depression, or sick leave because of stress. They are carrying so much on their plate: from trying to make a better economy for themselves and their kids (usually struggling with a dead-end or boring job, or overworked in their own business) to constantly feeling guilty about how they are not doing enough for their kids, their house, and their work. They are always worrying that they are not doing “it” right, and they continue to take care of everything else—their aging parents, their friends, and their community. Meanwhile, they struggle to find someone who will be there to love and support them. They long for someone to be a good partner both in their everyday tasks, and in understanding their priorities to their children, while still being there to have fun, talk to, and experience passion with.
What Do Most Single Swedish Women Want?
The most pertinent questions of these single women are:
- How come I am working so hard when I’m not even getting what I want?
- How come I am not happy? When will my life become better?
- How come I don’t have enough time for everything in my life?
- How do I get the love, support, money and success that I want?
Married Swedish Women Want Almost the Same Things!
And for the women who are married or are in long-term relationships, their complaints sound slightly different, but underneath, it’s the same tired, overwhelmed frustrations.
Their complaints are:
- How come I am working so hard with so few results?
- How come I am not happy, and when will I be?
- How come I don’t have enough time to take care of everything? (same as above)
- How come my husband is so incapable of meeting me, or so unavailable to catch up with me? (Shhhhh, this is their deep secret. It takes awhile for them to admit this.)
The truth is, for women in long-term partnerships, there are a lot of disappointments that they are living with. Their men are usually kind, considerate, reliable, and a good father. But as a partner to them, the men are falling a little short. Communication and common interest outside of caring for the children have dwindled down to some type of grunt, sigh, or eye-roll. Sex and passion are at best obligatory. And everything (finance, change, joy, play) seems limited and difficult. The women are not happy and are not being met with a passionate, focus, and powerful partner that they deserve. For these women, there are only three solutions: to leave, to stay, or to work harder to compensate for this lack.
What Happens if the Woman Leaves the Relationship?
Why this is so alarming is because in the animal kingdom, if the female (the caregiver) is not strong enough, the species will die out! What we are seeing for humans is that as the woman, the mom, the partner gets more and more loaded with responsibilities, she becomes weaker mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. There is not enough time and energy left in her to raise her children properly, to contribute to a healthy society, and to enjoy love and partnership with their men. Swedish women are depleted. The harder they try to accommodate, the worse their situation becomes. This is bad for the women, for the children, for the men involved, and for society as a whole.
What is the Man’s Role in a Relationship?
Speaking of men, it’s not a bed of roses for them either. Men are also hurting in this journey. And even though it’s no fault of their own, most of the time, the men find themselves a source to be blamed on, for their woman’s unhappiness. What I know about them: men want to be partners with women, and they want to love, protect and care for their women. They want to be the hero for and to please women. When a woman is so tired, overwhelmed, and angry about her life, she can’t let any man in. The woman actually becomes a “Hero Killer,” resulting in a situation where nothing a guy does will ever be good enough, because internally, the woman does not feel like she is good enough. That creates a huge disparity between men and women. No one is happy then.
Where Can Women Get Help?
This is where I come in. This past year over 25 thousand Swedish women are wondering what’s next after their official divorce. To put it simply, I show women how to let love in, to replenish themselves, to be happy again, so that they can turn this dynamic around. Only when the woman feels more ease and more supported can she open up to let more money, success, connection, and passion in. I also show women what they are doing that blocks them from having the love, joy, and economy that they want. This is what I call your Hot Life Hot Love!
Get the Love, Happiness and Success That You Want!
This is why I am so passionate about working with divorced and single moms. I am one of them. I know what it is like to be working so hard and not getting the love and happiness and success that I want. I love seeing that turnaround in women. It’s easier than you think. I will be back on October 3-4, 2015 in Malmo, Sweden to bring my 2 Day Live Event Hot Life Hot Love. At the event I will show every women step by step, what is happening that leaves them so unhappy. Then, I’ll demonstrate how to turn it all around so that they can have more love, support, success, and joy in their lives!
BIO: Mai Vu is an International Speaker and Master Coach with 20 years experience. Mai works with tired female entrepreneurs and career women who are divorced & dating again. Mai has a successful 6 figure coaching business, serving over 1000 women all over the world. She has trained and certified over 1000 life coaches for The Coaches Training Institute, the world most prestigious and oldest coach training school. Mai Vu has been described as playful, funny, bold, and is a stand for all humans having Hot Life & Hot Love!