Reality Bites! January Depression/Panic/Regret/Scramble/Drowning

The New Year is Starting Faster Than I Am

It’s January 20th, but I thought it was January 25th already. The Xmas tree is still up, and desperately needs to be put away. I missed the sales on Xmas decoration plastic containers, and now they are sold out at Target. How did this happen? How did I get so behind so soon?

…The More Behind I Get

image: laptop computer andcalculatorI had so many plans for January. I was supposed to be orderly, on track, ahead of schedule. The financial books were supposed to be updated and ready for taxes this year, the house was supposed to be organized and ready to receive the new and prosperous year, the business plan was supposed to execute flawlessly, blah blah blah… It seems like the key words here are “supposed to be” and I find myself NOT meeting my own expectations. Whoaaaa!!!  😱 😩😪

Yoga, Meditation, and Crack Cocaine

image:divorced woman alone contemplatingWhen things fall apart, I go back to meditation and yoga.  My body is jittery like I’m withdrawing from crack cocaine on both the meditation cushion and the yoga mat.  I can’t hold a pose or sit still for longer than 5 minutes.  This tells me that I am stressed and overwhelmed.  Yikes! 😖 What do you do when this happens to you?

My 5 Steps to Pull it Together

I stop and do what I teach my hard-working, entrepreneur moms, who want it all: a successful thriving business, happy kids, and a hot love life! 

  • Step 1: Breathe
  • Step 2: Tend to your hard-working, stressed out “peasant” woman inside.  Ask her what am I afraid of?  What is the pressure that I am putting on myself?  What do I need to let go, but I am afraid to do it?  Breathe! 💆
  • Step 3:  Give yourself a big reassuring hug: “It’s OK, Everything is OK.  Everything WILL be OK.”  Breathe (yes, again)!
  • Step 4:  Pick ONE thing to focus on and finish.  One small thing is good enough.  Push everything aside.  Just do one thing.  Breathe. 🚀
  • Step 5:  Celebrate and love the heck out of yourself for getting that done.  Yay!!! 🎉

Your turn… Share with me what you do to regroup and keep going. Want further feel good? Check out my upcoming 2-day Hot Life Hot Love event on March 12 & 13, 2016 at The Purple Orchid.

The Divorced Mom’s Guide to Dating

For a few years now I’ve been secretly working on writing my first book! And ladies…. it’s coming out soon! The Divorced Mom’s Guide to Dating; How to be Loved, Adored and Cherished! After embracing my introverted side & hunkering down in my writing place, I am almost done writing this bestseller. It is due to come out in February, just in time for you know what!

Free Copies of my New Book!

I’m giving away free copies to my peeps.  Sign up now for a chance to win a free book!

Magic, Miracles, and Mosquitoes in the Amazon, Oh My!


Magic, Miracles, and Mosquitoes in the Amazon – Oh My!

Iquitos-MapIs visiting the Amazon and going to Machu Picchu on your bucket list?  I highly recommend that you bump it up and go sooner than later. You need stamina for this kind of trip.  And it’s too good to wait. 

I had the great honor and blessing to spend 15 days in The Amazon jungle, living on site with the shaman and his family, alongside 7 other American friends as we seek out the wisdom and healing of the Ayahuasca medicine.  Afterward we spent 6 days touring around Cuzco, the neighboring cities, and finally making it to Machu Picchu.



MachuPichuIt was an incredible trip in so many ways.  It has been a few weeks since I got back and I am still struggling for words to describe and capture the full extent of the journey.  Partly because all the pieces are still coming together.  Perhaps that is one of the many messages that I am receiving:  Life and her lessons continue to show themselves to me, long after the event is over.  My job is to look, listen, and take in.  

I will break the highlights into different links, so that you can click on to whatever topic that interest you the most.  I have some beautiful pictures of the trip; the Ayahuasca process and her impact on us; and what 3 things I learned from The Amazon that might help you with your business and love life.  


As always I look forward to hearing your reactions and comments.  

Please leave me a note below and share what calls to you from the Amazon or the Ayahuasca Experience.


Now, That’s HOT!






For more information on Mai’s Signature Event “Hot Life Hot Love” Click here

My Predictions for 2015. Are You In It?

My Predictions for 2015. Are You In It? 

Happy New Year! I am so excited to bring you this newsletter. I hope it will inspire your heart and tickle your funny bone. I want it to delight and entertain you! In this newsletter, we are celebrating the love and miracles my clients made this past year to inspire and give you a glimpse of what is possible. My “2015 Predictions” video is super funny as I introduce a new part of me – MaiDame Vuvuvuvuski. See below.

2014 Celebrations

In my closing sessions with my VIP clients, I had the pleasure of witnessing the love and miracles that they brought into their lives. Click the picture to read some of the ones that they shared or click here

Screen Shot 2014-12-30 at 4.12.49 PM
“I want to thank you for your work and the impact it has had on my life and my kids. Before I worked with you, I was dating all the wrong guys, stressing over my business and how to make ends meet, and frustrated all the time. After six months, I saw a huge change in myself. I am so much happier and at peace. I am with a very nice man who loves and adores me. My business is making twice the income and it continues to grow. I am so happy I can’t stop grinning. Your work is life changing. Thank you for showing me the way.” D. H. 

 2015 Predictions From MaiDamme Vuvuvuski…

I hope you enjoyed this video! I truly want the world for you and want to be there every step of the way. I know deep in my soul that my support will help make amazing things happen in your life. Below are some fun ways you can play with me in 2015 as my New Years gifts to you:

  • Pre-register for my Big Event: March 7th & 8th Hot Live Hot Love It will knock your socks off!

Want to see or hear me live before the big event? Then come to:

  • FemTalks, Women Wanting to Be Successful in Business, in Berkeley Feb 9
  • Understanding Men webinar on Feb. 12th, 6:00pm PT  (more info coming soon)

With love, Mai (& Maia, my daughter and videographer and film editor for MaiDamme Vuvuvuski) Love Life - Mai and Maia

Hot Love Bound

Meet JoEllen.  She came to me about 4 weeks ago.

She is 57 years old and has been in technology for 40 years.  She has two children who are almost adults and got divorced after being married to an alcoholic for 20 years. She says, “I buried myself for the last 10 years, barely thinking I might want a companion. I’ve been divorced for over 5 years now and  I am not sure that I can make a good decision regarding a man.  I have a lot of pain still.”

When I saw JoEllen on Google Hangouts for the first time I was blown away, she is beautiful!  Before this I imagined her as old, dumpy and raggedy from her tone of voice and the way she talked about herself. You see, the biggest thing that hangs over JoEllen’s mind and drains her of her vitality is the GUILT over leaving her marriage.  Actually, it’s a GUILT-ping pong battle in her head between staying too long and not having protecting her children better over leaving him behind and breaking the marriage.  It has been 5 years and she still wonders if there was one more thing she could or should have done.

During our recent 1-on-1 coaching session, JoEllen was describing her marriage and it hit me like a Mac truck,  she did not have a marriage. A marriage implies two people care for each other, doing their best to give into the relationship, to nurture, to love and to hold each other.  What she had was a prison sentence and through a lot of tenacity, she escaped!

That distinction was fascinating to both her and I.  She was unconsciously calling what she had “a marriage” instead of seeing it for what it was: a prison term. She was held captive, abused, and neglected for twenty years.  Interesting how this change in perspective busted up the guilt and shame that she was carrying in her head.  Her old reference to her “marriage” really confused her when looking forward to having a new relationship with a man.  Who would want another marriage or relationship if that is what you end up with, an indefinite prison term?!

JoEllen’s latest homework in the Loving Your 3P’s VIP program is to create a vision board of the kind of man and quality of relationship she wants in her life.  She recently said to me, “I remember being 12 years old, having all the posters of teenage idols on my wall, dreaming of my future when my mother made me take them all down saying, ‘Stop dreaming about such things’. Now you, Mai are making me put them back up!”  All I can say back to JoEllen is, “Honey, I am helping you get on your way to HOT LOVE!”

JoEllen’s story is one of many of my client’s journeys toward cultivating hot love in their lives.  HOT LOVE starts with reclaiming our beauty and vitality, letting go of our guilt and should of’s, and then redefining what kind of man and relationship they we want in their lives.

Do you know anyone who is confused about their relationship, thinking they have or had a marriage but really they don’t or didn’t? If so, send them to me!  We are HOT LOVE bound in 2014.  We will be doing everything it takes to make love HOT.  Let me help them make some miracles in their life or help them overcome resistance to change and be well on their way to having the HOT LOVE that they secretly hunger for.


“STAND-UP”: How Mai got her Turn On back

Holly smoke! I have been going through yet another reinventing process for the last 6 months. These processes happen about 5-10 times in a person’s life. This is my fourth one. Just because I have had some experience with this process previously does NOT mean that this time it is any easier. In fact, I do believe, the process actually gets harder and scarier each time. Because as we get older, we have more things to loose, a larger ego to manage. and more patterns to undo.

The reinventing process looked like this:
1. I was going a long on my path, grooving and doing my things. Then suddenly “WHAM!” I looked down and my path was gone. Nothing was exciting anymore. Everything that was working became really hard or dried up and went away. I got fired from projects out of the blue. One minute I had everything, the next I had nothing.
2. I panicked (of course)! I moaned, I groaned, I moped, I groped. Still nothing came. My life continued to unravel.
3. I continued to resist, I prayed, I sprayed (not in a good way). I hired myself a coach. Thank God. I stabilized. But I continued to resist. My Turned On factor was low.
4. I made bargains to God, to myself, to my coach, to my old employers. No one was buying my old story line, especially myself. I hated myself (why are you doing this to us? why now? again?) I hated my coach (not really. Thank God he was willing.)
5. Now What? I settled down. I started to listen. I couldn’t avoid the truths anymore. But what are the truths? and what are the cover-ups? How do I know? The more I listened, the more confused I got, the more pain I accumulated. I contracted, I hardened, I braced, I doubted, I frowned, I dragged…I thought of going to get a job! That thought almost killed me.
6. Finally to save myself, I went to yoga (regularly), I sat and meditated for days, I juiced, I cleansed, I prayed some more, I quantum lept, I channeled and talked to spirits, I reached out to friends, I collaborated on every crazy but FUN ideas that came to me. I begged for help my spirits and guides. I surrendered: What is my higher calling? Please tell me, I promise I will follow THIS TIME!
7. Slowly, step by step, piece by piece, the new puzzle came together. I came up with a new title that inspires me and reengages me. I have a new game plan, a bigger message. I even have a new logo and look. This could be exciting!!!!
I am not ready to reveal the whole grand plan yet. But one piece involves me learning to make people laugh on large corporate stage. That scares the S!@#%&T out of me! So I looked up the definition of comedy today.

“Stand-up comedy is a comedic art form. Usually, a comedian performs in front of a live audience, speaking directly to them. The performer is commonly known as a comic, stand-up comic, stand-up comedian or simply a stand-up.”

I Finally GOT IT! The Universe’s latest loving message to me. “STAND UP!”

…to be continued